CPTSD DIAGNOSTIC MAP
Organized by: Limbic Hijack • Attachment System • Nervous System State • Repair Steps
Plain-language, therapeutic framing
1. LIMBIC HIJACK MAP
What happens when the survival brain takes over before the thinking brain can respond.
These patterns are not personality flaws — they are automatic nervous system responses shaped by trauma, unpredictability, or chronic emotional instability.
| Pattern |
What’s Happening Neurobiologically |
| Future Faking |
The brain uses idealized future scenarios to reduce anxiety and avoid the discomfort of uncertainty. Dopamine escape strategy. |
| Gifts With Strings |
Giving becomes a way to secure connection or prevent abandonment. Oxytocin bonding used for control. |
| Apology Loops |
Shame activation triggers rapid, circular apologies intended to stop conflict, not to repair it. |
| Crying While Dysregulated |
Emotional flooding causes autonomic overwhelm; tears emerge without reflective awareness. |
| Overload → Withdrawal → Flooding |
Autonomic cycling between sympathetic overload and parasympathetic collapse, followed by emotional overflow. |
| Love-Bomb → Cold → Sweet |
Unstable regulation leads to intense connection, sudden deactivation, then attempts to reconnect. |
| Rapid Cycling |
Difficulty shifting between emotional states due to impaired affect regulation. |
| Victim Reversal |
The brain protects against shame by flipping roles when threatened. |
| Projection |
Disowned emotions or behaviors are attributed to the partner to reduce internal distress. |
| Punitive Silence |
Freeze-based shutdown that may appear intentional but is often an involuntary distancing response. |
| Panic Attachments |
Attachment system hyperactivates; urgent bonding attempts soothe internal threat. |
| Guilt-Trip Apologies |
Emotional collapse leads to apologies that seek comfort instead of accountability. |
| Abandonment Threats |
Fight-or-flight triggers “leave / be left” impulses to regain a sense of control. |
2. ATTACHMENT SYSTEM MAP
CPTSD often creates mixed or unstable attachment patterns. These patterns are not intentional manipulation — they are protective strategies learned in unsafe environments.
ANXIOUS ATTACHMENT PATTERNS
Common reactions when connection feels unstable.
- Seeking reassurance repeatedly
- Overanalyzing messages or tone
- Emotional overwhelm during conflict
- Clinging or panic bonding
- Difficulty tolerating ambiguity
- Apology loops
- Fear-driven fantasy about the future
Core fear: being abandoned
Internal belief: “I won’t be okay if you pull away.”
AVOIDANT ATTACHMENT PATTERNS
Common reactions when closeness feels overwhelming.
- Minimal responses
- Delayed communication
- Emotional shutdown
- Needing space without warning
- Responding defensively to needs
- Viewing conflict as engulfment
Core fear: being controlled or invaded
Internal belief: “If I get too close, I’ll lose myself.”
DISORGANIZED ATTACHMENT PATTERNS
When the brain sends mixed signals: “Come closer” and “Go away.”
- Rapid emotional shifts
- Sudden anger followed by sudden affection
- Difficulty resolving conflict without escalation
- Switching between clinging and distancing
- Feeling unsafe during both closeness and separation
Core fear: both rejection and intimacy
Internal belief: “Connection is dangerous and necessary.”
3. NERVOUS SYSTEM STATE MAP
Fight • Flight • Freeze • Fawn
These states are automatic physiological responses.
They explain why people act in ways they later regret.
FIGHT — Sympathetic Mobilization
Signals: irritation, defensiveness, anger, confrontation
Behaviors:
- Blame-shifting
- Verbal attacks
- Emotional intensity
- Boundary pushing
- “You made me feel this way” statements
Purpose: regain control when threatened.
FLIGHT — Sympathetic Escape
Signals: anxiety, restlessness, overwhelm
Behaviors:
- Pulling away
- Avoiding messages
- Distancing
- Leaving the room mid-conflict
- Threatening to end the relationship
Purpose: escape perceived relational danger.
FREEZE — Parasympathetic Shutdown
Signals: numbness, blankness, confusion
Behaviors:
- Going silent
- Delayed responses
- Emotional inaccessibility
- Collapsing into shutdown
- Being unable to articulate thoughts
Purpose: conserve energy when threat feels inescapable.
FAWN — Appease Response
Signals: guilt, over-accommodation, people-pleasing
Behaviors:
- Over-apologizing
- Giving to avoid conflict
- Suppressing needs
- Disagreeing with self to keep peace
- Taking responsibility for others’ emotions
Purpose: restore safety through compliance.
4. REPAIR STEPS (CLINICAL PROTOCOL)
How to restore safety, connection, and regulation.
These steps work individually, in couples work, or within crisis moments.
A. LIMBIC REGULATION TOOLS
Goal: calm the survival brain so the reasoning brain can function.
- 90-second amygdala reset (slow exhale emphasis)
- Box breathing or 4-7-8 breathing
- Sensory grounding (temperature, texture, sound)
- “Pause and return” boundaries:
“I need 20 minutes to regulate. I will come back.”
- No problem-solving during emotional flooding
B. ATTACHMENT REPAIR
For Anxious Activation
- Validate fear without reinforcing it
- Use predictable, consistent communication
- Offer shorter, clearer check-ins
- Establish structured times for deeper conversations
- Encourage self-soothing between interactions
For Avoidant Activation
- Keep communication brief and emotionally safe
- Reduce intensity, increase clarity
- Offer space with connection, not space as separation
- Reinforce needs as valid, not burdensome
- Avoid cornering or demanding immediate discussion
For Disorganized Activation
- Use predictable routines
- Slow conflict down
- Avoid all-or-nothing language
- Debrief after escalations without blame
- Re-establish safety before discussing content
- Create rituals for repair
C. NERVOUS SYSTEM REPAIR
Fight → Calm
- De-escalation phrases
- Physical movement to release activation
- Lower volume/tone
- Ownership statements
Flight → Re-engage
- Gentle, non-pressuring communication
- Warm tone
- Invitations instead of demands
- Predictable time frames for reconnection
Freeze → Thaw
- Help person orient to the environment
- Use gentle sensory input
- Avoid urgent questioning
- Validate that shutdown is involuntary
Fawn → Recenter
- Practice clear boundaries
- Encourage identification of personal needs
- Support self-worth and autonomy
- Discourage apology-based bonding
D. RELATIONSHIP REPAIR (4-Step Protocol)
A clinical, repeatable method for repairing ruptures.
1. Identify the Pattern
“I notice we’re in a fight/flight/freeze/fawn loop.”
2. Identify the Emotional State
“My nervous system feels activated.”
3. Identify the Need
“I need regulation / clarity / space / connection.”
4. Identify the Plan
“Let’s pause and reconnect at ___.”
This reduces escalation, shame, and misinterpretation.