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CPTSD DIAGNOSTIC MAP

CPTSD DIAGNOSTIC MAP

Organized by: Limbic Hijack • Attachment System • Nervous System State • Repair Steps

Plain-language, therapeutic framing

1. LIMBIC HIJACK MAP

What happens when the survival brain takes over before the thinking brain can respond.

These patterns are not personality flaws — they are automatic nervous system responses shaped by trauma, unpredictability, or chronic emotional instability.

Pattern What’s Happening Neurobiologically
Future Faking The brain uses idealized future scenarios to reduce anxiety and avoid the discomfort of uncertainty. Dopamine escape strategy.
Gifts With Strings Giving becomes a way to secure connection or prevent abandonment. Oxytocin bonding used for control.
Apology Loops Shame activation triggers rapid, circular apologies intended to stop conflict, not to repair it.
Crying While Dysregulated Emotional flooding causes autonomic overwhelm; tears emerge without reflective awareness.
Overload → Withdrawal → Flooding Autonomic cycling between sympathetic overload and parasympathetic collapse, followed by emotional overflow.
Love-Bomb → Cold → Sweet Unstable regulation leads to intense connection, sudden deactivation, then attempts to reconnect.
Rapid Cycling Difficulty shifting between emotional states due to impaired affect regulation.
Victim Reversal The brain protects against shame by flipping roles when threatened.
Projection Disowned emotions or behaviors are attributed to the partner to reduce internal distress.
Punitive Silence Freeze-based shutdown that may appear intentional but is often an involuntary distancing response.
Panic Attachments Attachment system hyperactivates; urgent bonding attempts soothe internal threat.
Guilt-Trip Apologies Emotional collapse leads to apologies that seek comfort instead of accountability.
Abandonment Threats Fight-or-flight triggers “leave / be left” impulses to regain a sense of control.

2. ATTACHMENT SYSTEM MAP

CPTSD often creates mixed or unstable attachment patterns. These patterns are not intentional manipulation — they are protective strategies learned in unsafe environments.

ANXIOUS ATTACHMENT PATTERNS

Common reactions when connection feels unstable.

  • Seeking reassurance repeatedly
  • Overanalyzing messages or tone
  • Emotional overwhelm during conflict
  • Clinging or panic bonding
  • Difficulty tolerating ambiguity
  • Apology loops
  • Fear-driven fantasy about the future

Core fear: being abandoned
Internal belief: “I won’t be okay if you pull away.”

AVOIDANT ATTACHMENT PATTERNS

Common reactions when closeness feels overwhelming.

  • Minimal responses
  • Delayed communication
  • Emotional shutdown
  • Needing space without warning
  • Responding defensively to needs
  • Viewing conflict as engulfment

Core fear: being controlled or invaded
Internal belief: “If I get too close, I’ll lose myself.”

DISORGANIZED ATTACHMENT PATTERNS

When the brain sends mixed signals: “Come closer” and “Go away.”

  • Rapid emotional shifts
  • Sudden anger followed by sudden affection
  • Difficulty resolving conflict without escalation
  • Switching between clinging and distancing
  • Feeling unsafe during both closeness and separation

Core fear: both rejection and intimacy
Internal belief: “Connection is dangerous and necessary.”

3. NERVOUS SYSTEM STATE MAP

Fight • Flight • Freeze • Fawn

These states are automatic physiological responses.
They explain why people act in ways they later regret.

FIGHT — Sympathetic Mobilization

Signals: irritation, defensiveness, anger, confrontation
Behaviors:

  • Blame-shifting
  • Verbal attacks
  • Emotional intensity
  • Boundary pushing
  • “You made me feel this way” statements

Purpose: regain control when threatened.

FLIGHT — Sympathetic Escape

Signals: anxiety, restlessness, overwhelm
Behaviors:

  • Pulling away
  • Avoiding messages
  • Distancing
  • Leaving the room mid-conflict
  • Threatening to end the relationship

Purpose: escape perceived relational danger.

FREEZE — Parasympathetic Shutdown

Signals: numbness, blankness, confusion
Behaviors:

  • Going silent
  • Delayed responses
  • Emotional inaccessibility
  • Collapsing into shutdown
  • Being unable to articulate thoughts

Purpose: conserve energy when threat feels inescapable.

FAWN — Appease Response

Signals: guilt, over-accommodation, people-pleasing
Behaviors:

  • Over-apologizing
  • Giving to avoid conflict
  • Suppressing needs
  • Disagreeing with self to keep peace
  • Taking responsibility for others’ emotions

Purpose: restore safety through compliance.

4. REPAIR STEPS (CLINICAL PROTOCOL)

How to restore safety, connection, and regulation.

These steps work individually, in couples work, or within crisis moments.

A. LIMBIC REGULATION TOOLS

Goal: calm the survival brain so the reasoning brain can function.

  • 90-second amygdala reset (slow exhale emphasis)
  • Box breathing or 4-7-8 breathing
  • Sensory grounding (temperature, texture, sound)
  • “Pause and return” boundaries:
    “I need 20 minutes to regulate. I will come back.”
  • No problem-solving during emotional flooding

B. ATTACHMENT REPAIR

For Anxious Activation

  • Validate fear without reinforcing it
  • Use predictable, consistent communication
  • Offer shorter, clearer check-ins
  • Establish structured times for deeper conversations
  • Encourage self-soothing between interactions

For Avoidant Activation

  • Keep communication brief and emotionally safe
  • Reduce intensity, increase clarity
  • Offer space with connection, not space as separation
  • Reinforce needs as valid, not burdensome
  • Avoid cornering or demanding immediate discussion

For Disorganized Activation

  • Use predictable routines
  • Slow conflict down
  • Avoid all-or-nothing language
  • Debrief after escalations without blame
  • Re-establish safety before discussing content
  • Create rituals for repair

C. NERVOUS SYSTEM REPAIR

Fight → Calm

  • De-escalation phrases
  • Physical movement to release activation
  • Lower volume/tone
  • Ownership statements

Flight → Re-engage

  • Gentle, non-pressuring communication
  • Warm tone
  • Invitations instead of demands
  • Predictable time frames for reconnection

Freeze → Thaw

  • Help person orient to the environment
  • Use gentle sensory input
  • Avoid urgent questioning
  • Validate that shutdown is involuntary

Fawn → Recenter

  • Practice clear boundaries
  • Encourage identification of personal needs
  • Support self-worth and autonomy
  • Discourage apology-based bonding

D. RELATIONSHIP REPAIR (4-Step Protocol)

A clinical, repeatable method for repairing ruptures.

1. Identify the Pattern

“I notice we’re in a fight/flight/freeze/fawn loop.”

2. Identify the Emotional State

“My nervous system feels activated.”

3. Identify the Need

“I need regulation / clarity / space / connection.”

4. Identify the Plan

“Let’s pause and reconnect at ___.”

This reduces escalation, shame, and misinterpretation.

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Picture of Pastor Matthew Stoltz

Pastor Matthew Stoltz

Lead Pastor of the Church of NORMAL | Waseca, MN

“To comfort the looped, confuse the proud, and make space for those who still hear God’s voice echoing through broken rituals.”
Matt is a CPTSD survivor, satirical theologian, and father of six who once tried to build a family without a permit and now walks out of the wreckage with sacred blueprints and a smoldering sense of humor. He writes from Wolf Den Zero, also known as Sanctuary 6, in the heart of Waseca, Minnesota.

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